Sunday, August 3, 2008

What makes me beautiful

An excerpt from my journal dated June 14...

Lord,
what makes me beautiful? is it my eyes or smile? what about my pretty blond hair? is it my polished nails or curves? is it how my jeans fit or how i look in a swimsuit? is it how stylish i am or my jewelry? is it what i like to do in my free time or how clean my home is? what about "doing my job"? does that make me beautiful?
what about when other people tell me so - does that make it true?

you've given me beauty that far surpasses all these things. i just wish i always saw what you see when i look in the mirror or can't fit into my old jeans anymore. i want so desperately to identify with how beautiful i am because i was made by you - the Creator of this universe. Being beautiful can be expressed through some of the things the world claims, but i know the most beautiful people are beautiful because they radiate You.

Please help me grow in my awareness of your presence and cling to my identity and beauty found in You alone. Help me enjoy the way you made me, rather than to resent you for it.
Help me be ok with where i'm at right now and help me see myself through your eyes. take my self-consciousness and pity for my body shape and size and fill me with Your Truth.

Be glorified in me, that I may radiate your glory.