Reflections of a mama to a wonderful boy, who has a rare genetic syndrome, near his birthday. Every year, I forget that Zach’s birthday isn’t only celebratory for me. It can also be a trigger for parts of grief of the things that are not yet and may never be. It’s a remembrance of both the gift of the sweet season where we had no idea that he was different from any other kid and the gift of finding out that, in fact, he is quite different. In big and small ways, our little joy-bringer has brought so much to our lives and to those around him. His joy is contagious, his energy seemingly endless, his passion fierce, his love of music infectious, his warmth and friendliness welcoming. And he also needs a lot of support, interpretation, advocacy, patience, understanding, brainstorming with teachers, redirecting and so on. As I’ve learned many times before, Joy and Grief often accompany each other; the two are not mutually exclusive. But that can make it hard for me to identify what e